Mother: Arminta (42)
Daughter: Signé (22)
Washington, DC
The Pole Girls
Not only do they look alike, act alike and pop each other’s pimples…this mom and daughter run a pole-dancing company together! Arminta (mom) and Signé, (daughter) run Pretty Girl Pole, a sexy, fitness based company that teaches pole dancing, twerk classes, chair dancing and for the less adventurous: Zumba. They dance, they teach, they twerk, and they’re especially known around town for their mobile pole-dancing parties. From women’s book clubs, bachelorette parties, birthdays, and other celebrations, the classes are for any woman between ages 18 and 81! From teaching a soccer mom to strut her sexy self or inverting the pastor’s wife upside down, Arminta and Signé love to empower women to embrace their body, their sex appeal and have a ton of fun in the process!
Carla is mom’s best friend and a second mom to Signé. In fact, Carla’s middle name is, “Signé” which inspired mom to name her daughter the same name. Mom and Carla started the pole company together in 2005 but since she was sixteen years old Signé has worked in the business. She started at the front desk of the studio - checking clients in, taking payments, and helping with cleaning up after classes. This was a controversial decision that Arminta caught a lot of flack for amongst family members and other moms. She invited anyone who objected to her daughter working there to a free class. Turns out, all of the moms came back for more classes! Signé received her Zumba certification at age 16 and began learning pole routines at age 18. She wasn’t allowed to touch a pole until she was 18! Moms rules! Together mom and daughter teach classes, do their own pole routines and run the business together alongside Carla.
Off the pole Signé and Arminta are still closer than most mothers and daughters. At home, they will often sleep together in the same bed, much to the dismay of Arminta’s husband Tito. Tito will have to ask to sleep in bed with his wife AND if it’s after 3am, he isn’t allowed in the room with them! Arminta has a special song that she wakes Signé up to every morning. Arminta dotes on her daughter, primps her hair, makes her breakfast in bed, and even pops her pimples and squeezes her pores and blackheads! They also go to Brazilian wax appointments together and will go to pole dancing classes together to check out the competition. They love to get their nails done, run errands, go to the gym and spend time getting ready together. Arminta is the quintessential "mama bear" which can get her into trouble if she doesn’t like the way someone talks to, about or even looks at her daughter. Signé thinks of her mom as the best, BEST friend she will ever have.
Signé and Arminta live together, along with Tito, Arminta's handsome, caring, loving, lawyer husband. Tito and Arminta's "honeymoon period" was cut short and they were only married a few months when Signé moved back in after college. They all agree that living together has been a huge balancing act, especially for Arminta because both Tito and Signé want Arminta's attention. Tito also has an 11-year-old daughter named Aniyah from a previous relationship which was an adjustment for both Signé and Arminta. Signé is still getting used to having to share her mom with someone else and the boundaries that come along with it. She finds it hard to not just walk into Arminta and Tito's room whenever she wants to. The casual clothing optional rule in the house has also been called into the question since Tito moved in. Signé is in a state of "arrested development" when it comes to her mom and her life outside of the house. She wants to have all of her mom's attention until she leaves the house, then she wants Arminta to not track her phone and check in with her all the time. Tito is unsure how to navigate being a new husband, a stepfather and a dad to his daughter, especially when he’s surrounded by such tight knit relationships. Tito does feel left out and wants to be closer to his wife and feel like a real husband. Signé's father is still a part of her life. He is remarried and lives local to D.C. They have a cordial, yet distant relationship.
Arminta and Tito have a picture perfect marriage as well as a real and loving relationship. The next natural step is them to have a baby of their own. They are both healthy, active, professional and very much in love, so the idea of a child is very real for both of them. Arminta is a healthy, 42-year-old woman and knows that with medical assistance (i.e. fertility treatments, IVF), a baby could be possible for them. Signé feels uncomfortable, territorial, sad and frightened about the prospect of a new baby. She doesn’t want to share her mother or disrupt the only life and relationship that she’s known her entire time on earth. Sharing Tito has already been disruption enough, what will happen if a baby enters the picture? Ultimately she is terrified that a baby will, "tarnish their relationship.”
Additionally, Signé is thinking about her future with Jordan, she thinks Jordan is "the one" but marriage is not in the near future for them. However, she thinks that it would be possible that she and Jordan would move in together in the near future. For Arminta, she can't even think about Signé moving out of the house again. She isn’t old enough, steady enough or mature enough in her mom’s perspective. It’s not even a conversation in her opinion. Signé's time away at college was enough for Arminta, she likes having her best friend under the same roof. Arminta also believes that couples shouldn't live together until they are married, so in her eyes, Signé should only move if she and Jordan get married.
Rituals:
· Pole dancing together, teaching pole dancing classes, hosting pole dancing parties for work and for play
· Arminta likes to "groom" Signé and pops her pimples and squeezes her blackheads
· Working out and exercising together on a daily basis
· Sleeping and cuddling the same bed together, despite mom having a live-in husband who is relegated to the couch
· Signé gives Arminta massages, holds her hand and is obsessed with rubbing Arminta's thighs
· Arminta schedules clients so she can be home to make Signé a full breakfast every morning
· Arminta wakes Signé up with a song that she has sung to her since she was a baby
· The duo gets Brazilian wax appointments together
Tension:
Arminta and Signé's relationship is reaching an inevitable crossroads. Signé is looking at her future and planning her path to success with her career and her life with Jordan. Arminta needs to make a decision about if she wants to have a baby. She and Tito are both on the same page, but Arminta is hoping that Signé will give her blessing. Signé is rooted in opposition when it comes to the thought of her mom having another baby and "replacing" her, she has diagnosed herself as having "only child syndrome." Arminta is going to have to decide if she can make a life-altering decision while potentially not have Signé's support.