Lance

Husband: Lance, Age 37

Missing Wife: Martje

Location: Los Angeles, California

Lance was last in contact with Martje in April of 2013.

Lance always danced to the beat of his own drum, a free-spirted young man who never wanted a traditional life. In 2010 Lance left his home-state of Michigan to intern at a fashion company in Italy. He loved the idea of being in Europe, immersing himself in a different culture and an alternative way of life. He was introduced to a group of friendly Germans, who then introduced him to a lovely, young German woman named Martje (pronounced Maht-yah) The couple hit it off immediately and the two quickly started dating. After his internship, Lance moved to Flensburg Germany (near the Germany-Denmark border) to live with Martje. He didn’t have the correct Visa, so he was living in the country illegally. During that time, Lance was working to establish his own men’s clothing company. 

In 2011 Lance and Martje discovered that they were going to have a son. They were ecstatic, which also triggered the young couple to get married. They were married in Germany in June 2011 and their son Noah was born February 12th of 2012. Lance was head over heels in love. According to Lance’s father, when Lance falls, “he falls hard.” The sudden pregnancy and subsequent marriage was a shock for both of their family and friends. They thought that they were moving quickly, but Lance was in love and building the life he had always dreamed of.

However, finances were tight and Lance wasn’t making the kind of money that he wanted to in order to support his budding family. He became consumed with his work and business, and less focused on Martje and the baby--who wanted and needed his attention. In retrospect, Lance admits that his priorities were askew, and that he wasn’t present in the way he needed to be. Lance desperately wanted more children, the house, the dream life, and therefore he needed more money and obsessively focused on work.

It came to a head in April 2013 when Martje called Lance asking for a ride home. When Lance told her that he was too busy, Martje told him that her parents would drive her home and that she would get Noah from school. However, Martje and Noah never came home that night. Weeks turned into months and no response; to the point Lance called local police to do a wellness check for information regarding his son. His best guess was that she was with her parents and family, but the family wouldn’t speak with him either. Lance was very close with her parents, which also confused him. He has fond memories of cutting down a Christmas tree with their family over the holidays. They had a great relationship.  

Because Lance wasn’t a full citizen, despite being married, he was forced to move back to the United States. In terms of his marriage, Lance never signed anything stating that he is divorced, so as far as he understands, he and Martje are still married.

Over the years Lance hasn’t yet been able to get back to Germany, he hasn’t been in touch with Martje or any of their mutual friends or her family. Lance, has recently renewed his passport and wants to travel back to Germany to locate Martje and their son but is unsure where to start. Lance feels like his life is stuck in limbo, unable to settle down or find a family or relationship of his own while he knows that Noah and Martje are still out there in Germany. Lance desperately wants to have a relationship with his son, but not get back together with Martje. He would love the opportunity to reconnect with Noah, even if it’s long distance. What makes Martje’s abandonment even more painful is the fact that Lance’s mother left him and his father while he was growing up. Lance understands all too well how an absent parent can impact a child. He doesn’t want the same for Noah.

 Lance feels like what Martje did was unfair and unjust, and believes depriving Noah of his father is wrong. Although he is hurt and frustrated Lance wants to extend an olive branch and apologize to Martje for the role he played that contributed to the demise of their relationship. Finding Martje and Noah would bring certainty and resolution to all the unanswered questions and hopefully a fresh-start to his stagnant, limbo-like life.